the Wedding: the Cruel and Unusual Punishment

... that we voluntarily choose to put ourselves through. It's self-inflicted unconstitutionality!

Now you might be wondering where all of this came from. Let me explain - I just went to my cousin's wedding this afternoon.

But before we move on, a tangent must occur. He is too young to be getting married! I mean every single one of my acquaintances is too young to be married- but most of them are. I mean, really guys, aren't we still just little kids? Where did we get the grand ideas to actually legalize our house-playing? During the ceremony today, I realized that the last time that my cousin and I spent more than 5 minutes in actual conversation, was 3.5 years ago and we were both 19. When did he become 22 and I, 23?

... Well, I guess if we really are that old, he is old enough to tie the knot. Odd - how time flies. Anyways, tangent over, moving on.

So you must be wondering how I could even think that a wedding, that day the female race looks toward in giddy anticipation - planning down to the minute, years in advance - sometimes slowing down through the diamond displays they so easily set in our paths at department stores - and lazily wandering onto wedding dress websites - how could I possibly accuse that well-thought-out and-looked-towards-day to be CRUEL and UNUSUAL punishment?

Well let's just look at it on the side of the girl that looks at all her married friends and realizes that really, the road of her Life has actually reached the marriage square - but where is her groom?

So it simply is....

Cruel and unusual punishment - to thrust all that romance, the giddiness, the sparkle in the eyes, the speeches given by ecstatic loved ones, the tinkling of glasses which is followed by the mandatory couple-kiss, the well-chosen colors, the Dress, the men in excellent attire, the mood music, the flowers, the electrifying amazingly RIGHT-feeling atmosphere - to thrust all of THAT upon a vulnerable young girl of 23 who is ready for her own fairy tale - her own Prince with which to ride away into the sunset, to kiss deeply after the Man says - you may kiss the Bride. I mean, aren't I right?

This is the definition of cruel and unusual punishment.

But we, the female race, bring it upon ourselves by enthusiastic dreaming and star gazing. One day, we will be the married bystanders amidst the family and friends; some of who are enjoying themselves immensely and some that are punished by our giddiness and sparkle, unbeknownst to even themselves until they are way too deep into the oh-so-"perfect-fit"-feeling.

And that is why we choose to inflict this unconstitutional punishment (to witness a wedding) upon ourselves- because ONE DAY it will be us.